Make Every Moment Count

I've been lost in my own world for these few days heh . I've been thinking about everything . Life , friendship , relationship . Lover boy is kinda frustrated seeing me daydreaming in class ;

Him : Oit . *sits beside me

Me : *smiles

Him : Buat maths ? Diamnya

Me : *nods , smiles , daydreams while pretending to read a maths question

Him : *stares at me

After 10 minutes

Him : B , kenapa ni ?

Me : Ha ? Takda apa la heh .

Him : *makes funny sounds

Me : *pretends to be preoccupied with maths exercise

Him : B tak gelak pun ? Tak senyum pun ?

Me : *smiles

Him : Bieee *touches my finger and stares at me

Me : *smiles

I wish I can tell him everything that had been twisting , worming in this little absurd mind of mine , but I can't seem to put it into words and there're just so much to tell , idk where to start . Yesterday , at about 4pm I texted nuna . The text kinda sounds like this ; " Na , can we not go to college but travel the world instead ? We work after SPM , save lots of money and then when we have enough money , we go on a roadtrip to find the meaning of life and find true love and happiness " . Gosh alya adriana , you're just so lost these days . Lover boy have been keeping me sane . These few nights , he had been sleeping late bcs of me . He's trying to fork out the reason I've been so different these days , but I don't know how to string sentences to make him understand everything . Haih . Maybe , I'll figure out a way to tell him everything this weekend .

I've been finding ways/words to express how much I love him , but there's nothing that can truly express how I really feel . I saw something happened to someone ( I'll blog about it in my next post , maybe heh) . And it occured to me that I can't bear the thought of losing him . Not being able to see him , hear his voice , touch him , no , I can't go through that . He's the other half that makes me whole and without him , I'm just incomplete . I know this post is cheesy , but it's how I really feel . I thank God so so much for giving me a chance to be with him and for the love he gave us (;